Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Things on my Mind

1. Nadya Suleman bugs the shit out of me. I can't get her out of my head. I was the same way with Brittany Spears when she was going through her nut job phase, but I had a ton of compassion for Brittany. I have no compassion for Nadya. For her 14 kids I have a ton of compassion, and concern.

The link above brings you to an article about the release of a 9-1-1 tape of Nadya frantically callling the police to look for her missing 5 year old son. Ok losing a kid sucks I will give her that. But on the tape she goes on and on about how she is going to kill herself, until the dispatcher rightly so, tells her to stop saying that in front of her other children. And Nadya is now quoted as saying she doesn't remember saying that about killing herself, and that she was just hormonal from the pregnancy with the octuplets.

I am telling you she can't do this by herself. And I know this for a fact because it's taken me 45 minutes just to write these 2 and a half paragraphs. I actually type pretty fast and Jake is napping, but both Bekah and Mike had to poo at the same time. Mike sprinted to the downstairs bathroom first so I had to escort Bekah upstairs to my bathroom and once I got her seated I hustled back downstairs to wipe Mike's butt. Then back upstairs to do the same for Bekah's tushy. As well as all the handwashing etc. etc. So does Nadya have 14 toilets in her house?

Two kids needing to use the toilet at the same time is really not a stressful issue. When I say Nadya can't do this by herself I mean all the other stuff and I mean all day long. And I know this for a fact.

2. So this is where I have to talk about feelings and hypocrisy. Unfortunately, my feelings and my hypocrisy. Last month I wrote about hearing of a local mom who committed suicide. I wrote about how it's important to reach out to others when we need help. But I am a big fat hypocrite because I didn't do that.

When I went to wean my youngest, Jake, from breast-feeding I suffered from post-partum depression. I was so lucky to not have gone through it before and really didn't know what was wrong with me. We had also just moved into a new house and I didn't have any help during the day with caring for the kids and unpacking, and I was beyond stressed out. Now I did share with others that I was stressed out but I usually talk about my feelings in a humorous way and downplay everything. So nobody knew that when Erik would go to round on his patients on the weekend, he would come home to find me in uncontrollable tears.

My children were never in any harm because I turned my anger and depression on myself and eventually, after a couple of months it all went away. But now 18 months down the road I realize that A) I was a complete coward for not seeking help. and B) It's only by luck that this period didn't last longer and ended up being detrimental for my kids. For which I would never forgive myself if that had happened.

Ok I don't necessarily feel better for admitting that I am not a super-mom but I do feel better being honest.

3. Excuse my need for numbering my thoughts but it's keeping me focused. The other issue that has been poking my frontal lobes this week is that story about the Army mom who brought her kids with her when she showed up to report for duty to go to Iraq. Her claim being that her husband travels for work and she does not have adequate care for her kids. Ok so I am not a mean person, don't get me wrong. I am all about choices though and so far in America we still have an all volunteer military. So she chose to be in the military. This woman also chose to have kids. After perusing the article it states that she had not been in active duty for quite awhile but she had to have known that we are at war and she could be called up for duty at any time. Which means she should have scrambled to have back up care for her precious kids ready to go.

Her actions/inaction pisses me off. I believe that this North Carolina Army mom did all working women and all military women a huge disservice. I have a friend in the military and I have seen her scramble for care for her kids, I also have family members active in the military, Army Ranger (cousin), a Marine (female cousin), Navy Seal (my brother Bill). These 3 do not have kids yet but I can't imagine my cousin Leah not having all her bases covered if she did have children. And I believe that if this woman had been a father he would not have been let go. I really believe this was sexist.

4. I didn't realize that people still listen to Rush Limbaugh! And not only do people still listen to him but whenever a Republican talks smack about Rush, a couple of days later that same Republican will go on his show and apologize. WTF!? He is just a radio guy. And the Democrats are playing into his bloated ego as well. I want people to ignore Rush Limbaugh because that is the worst we can do to him. So I will stop giving him attention as well.

5. American Idol is so damn boring this year!! And the new judge is pointless and the wildcard stuff is just hurting my small brain. It better pick up soon. They should have made the blind guy dance, give him a chance at least.

6. The California Supreme Court is weighing the constitutionality of Proposition 8. Hopefully they will come to their senses and realize that denying civil rights to humans is unconstitutional. So far I haven't seen any pics of guys wearing assless chaps. They are probably at work and I will have to wait for the evening news.

7. Here is the last thing I am going to talk about today; our economy now compared to The Great Depression. The article I have linked points out the similarities with our current situation to the events that lead to The Great Depression. They are very similar. That article talks about the financial factors. I want to talk about social factors.

My grandmother was born in 1923 and came to California during the depression. We are talking Grapes Of Wrath stuff here. They ended up in The Central Valley, living under a bridge in Modesto. The 7th St. bridge, also called Lion's Gate Bridge. There were 10 kids all together. Eventually they were able to get a dairy farm.

My Grandmother ended up being a mother of 6 and solidly middle class. Her house is spotless, and she prefers Cadillacs and poodles. But she saves everything. Even the very last swallow of root beer she will put in a jar and you can finish it the next day. Yuck. But I understand what drives those habits.

One time I was visiting my Grandmother while her sister Julia was in town. I was raiding her fridge and my Grandma Hazel and Great-Aunt Julia were being all cute, knitting and watch the Home and Garden channel on t.v. I was half listening to their chatter when Grandma says, "Remember when Dad tried to sell me?". I froze with my fork halfway to my mouth. "Grandma, what?!". "Oh yes my father tried to sell me to a Modesto doctor and his wife who couldn't have kids.". I was immediately concerned thinking, if this had happened I wouldn't exist. "What stopped your Dad from selling you?", I asked. "Well he felt bad because my mother and I couldn't stop crying while we packed my suitcase.". So my Great-Grandfather changed his mind and didn't sell his precious daugther. Yikes, that story gives me the willies.

I would hope it is not that easy to sell a kid in America at this present day and age but with the rise in unemployment and homelessness what are the permanent social changes we are going to see? What are my kids' generation going to be like when they are adults? I realize my kids are not being affected by any homelessness or unemployment and I am very grateful for that. But I am curious about their generation in totality.

Ok I am done, thanks for listening.


Britta said...

Actually, on the topic of selling kids--my husband keeps commenting that he's seen quite a few stories on the news lately about loads of people abandoning their kids. Some state made it legal for people to drop their kids off at any hospital, (I think it was hospital--maybe social services office?) no questions asked, and an eyebrow-raising number of folks are choosing to do so. I have mixed feelings about it, so I can't really go into that here...but it really speaks to how screwed-up things are.

Nadya Suleman drives me nuts, too. Referencing the above--this is exactly why i have mixed feelings about people dumping off their kids, because, despite how cold it sounds, I do believe that some people probably should give their kids up for the greater good.

And I TOTALLY HEAR YOU on the American Idol thing! That extra judge is just more superflous babbling! I haven't truly enjoyed this show in years, yet I keep watching it out of habit.

Charlotte said...

Yes, I can't remember what state that was but they passed a safe haven law that you can bring your children to a hospital if you were unable to care for them with no consequences. Well they left a huge loophole and people were dropping off kids as old as 17! One guy dropped off all of his 9 kids but then said he wanted visitation. He just couldn't afford them anymore. They have since amended this to include only babies.

Nadya sucks and so does American Idol.