Thursday, May 15, 2014

10 Things I Will Do When My Children Turn 35 and Above.

10 Things I will do when my children turn 35 and above:

1. Bust through the bathroom door while you are showering or reliving yourself and ask the most random question ever. So random it actually makes you Google when you are done with your toiletries. 

2. Spill their coffee. Like throw that shit across the room. 

3. Stain their clothes. Forever.

4.Chew on stuff. Like your phone charger, toys, remote control, your cutest high heels, bracelets, Valentine's Card, flash cards, puzzle pieces etc. 

5. Leave the most jagged Lego's I can find in their bed, with the sheets drawn. 

6. Flood their house. 

7. Spill their beer. Like soak an entire couch cushion with beer. Their couch.

8. Shit through my pants on a plane. 

9. Grab their boob in public, for absolutely no reason. Hard. 

10. Love them unconditionally.