Conversations with a 4 year old Michael

"Mom where are we going after we take Bekah to preschool?"


"The bank, Target and then home."


"Mom"


"What?"


"I have an idea, let's go the Kid's Discovery Museum!"


"Honey that's in San Jose and too far to go today because you have school later."


"But mooooom...."


"Mike stop whining!"


"Ok but we should go to the museum because it's not foggy."


Pause while I think what the hell fog has anything to do with going to the Children's Discovery Museum.


"You are right, it's not foggy but we aren't going today."


"Where are we going?"


"I just told you!"


"Can we go to the bank with lollypops?"


"Yes"


We go to bank, get lollypops, deposit check and drive to Target.


"Why are we going to Target?"


"To get medicine"


"Why?"


"Because mommy and daddy are old and old people take medicine."


Once we get to the pharmacy Mike runs to the counter and yells "Hey is anybody here?"


"Michael! We have to wait our turn in line."


"Mom"


"What?"


"Can I have a toy?"


"No"


"Whyyyyyy?"


"Mike stop whining!"


"I am good why can't I have a toy?"


"Auntie Merrill just bought you a toy and Hanukkah is coming and you will get a ton of toys."


"Mom"


"What?"


"Can I have a treat?"


"You just had a lollypop!"


"They have a Starbucks here"


Damn he's got me on that one, I need coffee bad.


"Ok if you are really good and don't run off, you and Jake can have a vanilla milk."


So we go look at Xmas trees while waiting for my prescription.


Very loudly, "We don't do Christmas because we are Jews!"


"That's right, but the trees are pretty."


We get our beverages and then go look at toys.


"Mom I want this for Hanukkah!" Repeats this 100 times at top of his lungs.


"Mom I haven't played with one of these in ages!"


"In ages? You are only 4"


"Mom I don't have a fishing pole."


"That's because we don't go fishing."


"We could go fishing."


"Yes someday we might go fishing and then you would need a pole, but not today."


We leave Target.


"Mom"


"What?"


"I have an idea, let's go to the park."


"Actually that's a really good idea, let's go. "


One hour later.


"Michael it's time to go honey you have to eat lunch and then go to school."


"Moooooom"


"Mike stop whining!"


"Ok 40 more minutes"


"How about 2 more minutes?"


"Mom I am having fun here"


"Me too but we have to go."


We get in van.


"Can we get Happy Meals?"


"No."


"Whyyyy?"


"Mike stop whining!"


"I love Happy Meals"


"You never eat your Happy Meal! You just play with the toy!"


"Where are we going after preschool?"


"Nowhere"


"Who is coming over tonight?"


"Nobody"


"But I love Auntie Merrill, I miss her!"


"You just saw her last night honey, she is busy today."


"Where is Oliver?"


"I don't know."


"But I miss Oliver and I want to have a sleepover tonight".


"You can't have a sleepover on a school night"


"I want to go out to dinner tonight with Daddy."


"Mike stop whining! We are not going out to lunch or dinner or having a sleepover. Not every day is a party honey. We had a long weekend and had fun and we need to relax tonight."


"Mom"


"What?"


"I love you"


"I love you too buddy. You are a very sweet boy and you make me laugh."